Following up on the last post where I talked about over communicating, I want to share a tool I use when critical feedback is not landing.

When I give critical feedback, I often ask the person to say it back to me. Not word for word, but in their own way.

It is not a test. It is a check for understanding.

Feedback is tricky. What we say is not always what someone hears. Tone, timing, or emotion can bend the message in ways we do not intend.

Asking them to share how they heard it gives you a mirror. It shows if the intent landed or if something got lost. Sometimes they capture it exactly. Other times it sounds different, softer or sharper than you meant. That moment is the opportunity to realign.

The goal is not to win the conversation. The goal is to make it useful.